What was so significant about 1980? I turned 25. I had already lived a quarter of a century about 22% of my life completed. And, where was I. Not where I wanted to be that is for sure. I was in the middle of a bad marriage with 2 small children. I had dropped out of college and was working as a clerk. My friends were moving right along. They were becoming doctors, lawyers, and teachers and, I was being left behind. I can't ever remember crying as hard or as long as I did that year. I cried for a full year or so it seems. And then one morning in November I woke up and decided I was not going to settle for this. I was better than this. I also recognized that no one was going to change anything for me, I was going to have to do it myself. So, I made a plan. A 25 year plan. I know it sounds crazy really, who makes a 25 year plan? Either someone with a lot of time on their hand or, someone truly unhappy with where they are in their life. I was the latter. I woke up that morning vowing that I was going to live the next 25 years pursuing my dreams and doing those things that I wanted to do. I knew I was capable I just had to take action.
So, I made the list, not a bucket list but a must do list. It started with things like, get out of my bad marriage, stop having a job and start a career, get my college degree and learn to control my temper. This list went on, I set my short term goals and my long term goals. Everything was doable but it was going to require commitment, focus and yes even sacrafice.
Somethings were taken out of my hands, like the bad marriage. First husband was out of the picture and the change lifted so much off my shoulders. It was kind of like God said "let's see if you are really serious, I'll remove this hurdle and see what you do with it". Well it was like I could see sunlight for the first time (in about 10 years) and the change translated to my attitude. I focused on myself, my family and starting a career.
I learned to channel my anger which was really frustration to more positive energy. I returned to school. Community College at first, then Temple... I ended up completing my degree at Widener University. I met someone, we had a child and then we married and blended our family. He is a great support and the ability to continue my plan was because of the support he provided. I earned a Bachelor's in Business Administration. In the meantime things were progressing at work. Promotions came with more responsibility. I had the opportunity to participate in major projects. I developed good credibility and things moved nicely. This was two major milestones in my plan the marriage and third child were a bonus. The time frame for accomplishing these milestones spanned about 10 years. As far as the family goes I wanted to make sure that my girls enjoyed their childhood, that they had self confidence and strong self esteem. All three have grown to be confident and accomplished young women of whom I am very proud. Another milestone met. By this time I was a vice president in my company. Additional milestone checked off.
Then the strangest thing happened... I turned 50 and I had accomplished all of the things I had laid out, my project was done. And, I was now lost, I was floundering... what do I do no now. Suffice to say I did not lay out another 25 year plan but I did return to school for my master's degree earning a Master of Jurisprudence in Health Law from Widener Law School. My new plan was that I decided to take life as it comes and no longer live by a regimented plan. Trust me the plan surely served its purpose, it kept me focused and on track.
Since then I retired from my company, I became a consultant and then joined another company. I am now a COO for a company in New Mexico where I live by the way.
Again, the plan was great but what I now realize that sometimes plans can also be limiting. I know that I let opportunities pass because I did not want to lose momentum or direction.
So the moral of this story ... Pay attention to your defining moments, create a plan and always have a plan b but don't limit yourself by what you laid out 20-25 years ago. Live each day to the fullest. Work hard, Play harder and love with a passion that can't be matched.
And never put an end date on your plan always assume there is another phase.
I learned to channel my anger which was really frustration to more positive energy. I returned to school. Community College at first, then Temple... I ended up completing my degree at Widener University. I met someone, we had a child and then we married and blended our family. He is a great support and the ability to continue my plan was because of the support he provided. I earned a Bachelor's in Business Administration. In the meantime things were progressing at work. Promotions came with more responsibility. I had the opportunity to participate in major projects. I developed good credibility and things moved nicely. This was two major milestones in my plan the marriage and third child were a bonus. The time frame for accomplishing these milestones spanned about 10 years. As far as the family goes I wanted to make sure that my girls enjoyed their childhood, that they had self confidence and strong self esteem. All three have grown to be confident and accomplished young women of whom I am very proud. Another milestone met. By this time I was a vice president in my company. Additional milestone checked off.
Then the strangest thing happened... I turned 50 and I had accomplished all of the things I had laid out, my project was done. And, I was now lost, I was floundering... what do I do no now. Suffice to say I did not lay out another 25 year plan but I did return to school for my master's degree earning a Master of Jurisprudence in Health Law from Widener Law School. My new plan was that I decided to take life as it comes and no longer live by a regimented plan. Trust me the plan surely served its purpose, it kept me focused and on track.
Since then I retired from my company, I became a consultant and then joined another company. I am now a COO for a company in New Mexico where I live by the way.
Again, the plan was great but what I now realize that sometimes plans can also be limiting. I know that I let opportunities pass because I did not want to lose momentum or direction.
So the moral of this story ... Pay attention to your defining moments, create a plan and always have a plan b but don't limit yourself by what you laid out 20-25 years ago. Live each day to the fullest. Work hard, Play harder and love with a passion that can't be matched.
And never put an end date on your plan always assume there is another phase.
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