I am blessed. I have completed 67 revolutions around the sun and God willing I will begin my 68th shorty like literally in 45 mins. The weird thing is I can still remember turning 16 when getting to my present age wasn't even a thought. This is not one of those let me go back and relive those years with everything I know now moments, those years remain intact and unchanged they were meant to be. All the years from then to now have formed me and I like who I am.
I thank God for every adventure, misadventure, unexpected venture and disastrous adventure, I thank Him for every success and every failure and all the ups and downs. Oh the lessons I have learned. I used to believe that saying "youth is wasted on the young" but youth is exactly what it is supposed to be its own special social experiment. And now, at this age, I have the benefit of understanding somethings you can only get away with when you are young, probably because at that age you are either too naive or too oblivious to have things hit you the way they do as an adult. As a kid and young adult I never really over thought what may or may not matter but then in my 30's and 40's I was consequence centered stuck on the what ifs. My 50's were my politically correct era but as I ventured out, experienced my fake single years, lived in different states meeting different folks it all started to clear up for me and when I hit 60 I finally got to the I really don't give a fuck stage of my life. Don't get me wrong I still care deeply about humanity, treating people well, equality and fairness and all those things but I was finally comfortable enough to do it authentically. The authenticity meant no more code switching, no more dressing a certain way or wearing my hair a certain way because it was expected, no more toeing the line to keep things smooth or thinking/rethinking how to make a statement as to not appear as the angry black woman or aggressive or ghetto. Getting to that point was liberating and I regained some of that youthful just do it or, better yet don't, attitude. I am just sorry it took so long to reach that point but happy that I got there before leaving the c-suite and the board rooms so the young women of color that I supported and mentored could see it and experience it.
Physically, mentally and spiritually I am in a good place. I am comfortable and don't feel the need or desire to please folks. It is not my job to make you feel good. Folks really do need to do that for themselves. I am who I am and I am happy, pleased and thankful to begin my 68th revolution around the sun.
Peace.
